×

Lifestyle Blog By Shauna Young

Dealing with Self-Doubt: 3 Tips That I Use to Keep Moving Forward

Friday, September 28, 2018
lifestyle, self-doubt, self-help, motivation, fashion, ootd, fall style, Canadian blogger, Montreal

I feel like I would be lying if I said everything has been good lately. 


There’s this stigma online that everyone must be happy at all times. Whether it’s bloggers sharing only positive posts and tips or visually seeing people living “their best lives” on instagram; everyone’s life appears extra perfect. We have reached a point where perfection and trying to show off our happiness has become more important than actually being happy and content with life. 

The past few weeks have been extremely difficult. September is always a tough month for anyone whose either just finished school (or if you’re like me), in this limbo of life. Feeling like you don’t really have a path is incredibly terrifying, especially for someone like myself who tends to plan every hour of her daily life. I’m happy that I chose to not settle, I truly am, but lately I’ve been feeling even more confused about whether or not there’s even a path out there for me. 

My current job offers me the flexibility to work from home and make my own schedule which works with being a competitive dancer, but at some point there has to be an end goal. At some point, there has to be a life after I stop competing. Again, terrifying and anxiety inducing thoughts because I now doubt every decision I make. 

I doubt whether there’s even a program out there that would suit me, I doubt my ability to grow and leave my current schedule (since I can be a creature of habit), and I doubt if what I'm currently giving effort to is worth it or if I'm just not good enough to ever be successful at it. 

Yeah, in a nutshell it’s been a pretty difficult time in my brain. 

lifestyle, self-doubt, self-help, motivation, fashion, ootd, fall style, Canadian blogger, Montreal

What’s frustrating is that I know these are all negative thoughts that won’t help me in the long run, but I can’t stop myself from thinking about them. Lately, it’s been hard being my positive and motivated self…. because I don’t really have anything to be motivated towards. 

So those negative thoughts have been eating away at me, which of course has now affected the aspects of my life I was passionate about…. Leaving me in a pretty dark place. It’s weird experiencing this internal conflict where my body knows it needs to be refocused on the good, when my mind is so stuck on the bad. 

The reason why I’ve opened this door to my personal thoughts, is because I know I’m not the only whose experienced hardships and feeling unworthy. Doubting yourself is the most compromising thing you could do to yourself, because it makes you feel like you suck at the things you’re already anxious towards and takes away any energy you may have left that you could use for the things you are good at. 

So all you keep doing is talking yourself out of everything even though the only thing you really want is answers to guide you. 

lifestyle, self-doubt, self-help, motivation, fashion, ootd, fall style, Canadian blogger, Montreal

But I Keep Fighting, Every Day. 

3 Tips on How to Move Forward

Words to Re-Centre Yourself 

I’m someone who resonates with quotes or a personal message. Something that I can read over and over and use it as a mantra for when my brain starts to wander to those negative thoughts. For example, list all of the things and people you are grateful for in life and keep that list somewhere that you can look at every day. Remind yourself that you’re not alone in this fight and that there’s always something to look forward to. Whatever it is, it has to be something that hits home and will be the reminder to keep trying. 

Journal

This was something I used to do as I child. Writing down the events of the day or sharing emotions which may seem easier to write as opposed to verbalizing. Doing this is a sort of release for me. I feel comfort in letting go of the thoughts in my brain and allowing them to leave me and rest on paper. 

I’ve also been able to then read past entries and look at it from an outside perspective (even if they’re my original words). Re-reading a past thought tends to leave us asking “what was I thinking” or maybe even finding a possible solution. Having those emotions on paper somehow makes them easier to face in a way that I couldn’t if I left them all in my mind. 


Socialize, Learn to Laugh & Share with Others

This is definitely not my initial choice, and given the opportunity, chances are my first reaction would be to shut off from the world and stay to myself. Instead, I’m trying to do the opposite. I realized that one of the benefits of going to school every day was the social interaction and being able to just laugh and enjoy company. Even if it’s spending the day with family members you haven’t seen in awhile, there’s something about social interaction that fixes your soul. 

Spending time with people who you enjoy and feel comfortable with may even become a safe space to talk and share those feelings you may be experiencing. One of the greatest reliefs is finding out you’re not alone. That someone is either feeling the same way or was at some point, and understands where you’re coming from. Never feel like you can’t talk to someone, it’s about finding the right people to share those feelings and thoughts with in a way that feels safe and leaves you feeling even just slightly better. 

Take a timeout and just let go of what’s holding you down. Laughing and forgetting (even for a few hours) might give you the boost or mental clarity you needed to re-evaluate the situation. 

lifestyle, self-doubt, self-help, motivation, fashion, ootd, fall style, Canadian blogger, Montreal


September is coming to an end, and I know you can’t just make these feelings disappear, but I’m moving forward and allowing myself to feel positive and hopeful of the future. I will not let this weight bring me down, and I hope with these 3 tips that you find a way to do the same. 

No comments: