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Lifestyle Blog By Shauna Young

Dealing with Personal Failure: How to Regain your Fire & Try Again

Wednesday, July 25, 2018
Dynamite Dress, Lifestyle, Summer, Street Style, Feminine, Dress, Sandals, Zara, Forever 21, Red Dress, Fashion, Beauty, Canadian Blogger, Montreal

Failure is a hard pill to swallow, no matter how positive you try to be, but that doesn’t mean you have to throw in the towel and give up. 

Thinking about failure gives me anxiety. I blame it on my type A personality, but imagining myself fail at everything I've worked so hard for just leaves my stomach in knots. Growing up, the idea of not being good at something would not only terrify me, but to a certain degree would prevent me from trying it in the first place. I think that's why it's taken me so long to try anything that seems out of the box, because the box was safe. It was safer doing something that came easier to me, to go for a career that didn't require much thought or passion to be good at, and more importantly to not push myself because of the "what ifs".


Dynamite Dress, Lifestyle, Summer, Street Style, Feminine, Dress, Sandals, Zara, Forever 21, Red Dress, Fashion, Beauty, Canadian Blogger, Montreal

I think many of you can agree that failure is something nobody likes. It sucks, the whole process of it. Whether you’re living it presently, accepting that it happened, or trying to figure out where you can go from it, failure is not an easy thing to get over. 



Outside this blogging world, I've shared the other passion in my life, competitive dance. I consider myself an athlete as I train almost everyday, stick to a balanced diet, and have given up any of my free time to pursue a sport that I love. It requires a certain amount of dedication and sacrifice which with age and the level I’m at only seems to get larger every year. 


Where I’m going with this is that even with all of this time spent doing everything right, everything that should set me up for success, failure can still happen. And that’s exactly what I recently experienced. 

Personal failure isn't like the traditional definition of what everyone considers as failure. Meaning, my overall result may not have been as bad as what someone else may consider a failure, but that’s what makes it personal. I failed myself and the goals that I laid out to achieve. 

Why did I fail? There’s a number of reasons as to why I failed that day that don't really matter now, but for the purpose of this post they all added up to me underperforming. 

Regardless of whether you can relate to my exact situation, we’ve all been there when it comes to personal failure. Maybe you were trying to achieve a certain GPA for school or you really wanted that promotion with work and it went to someone else. Whatever it may be, personal failure exists in us all. 

Relating it to the world of blogging, I feel like all you bloggers could agree that we have moments where we feel like we failed every week. 

 One second I see improvement and growth and the next I feel like nobody cares and I’m wasting my time. As someone whose also pursuing a creative outlet and potential career, failure is not just a possibility, but something I need to expect and grow from. 

What I’m getting at is that we’ve all experienced some sort of failure - it’s how you pick yourself up from it that really matters. Today I'm sharing my process of how I deal with failure to share how you can better yourself and grow from those tough times!

Dynamite Dress, Lifestyle, Summer, Street Style, Feminine, Dress, Sandals, Zara, Forever 21, Red Dress, Fashion, Beauty, Canadian Blogger, Montreal


Acceptance - You Can’t Change the Past. 

Personally, this is the hardest part when it comes to failure. Yes in that moment it sucks, but its the days and weeks that follow it that are really tough. 

You almost find yourself wanting to re-live it, tearing yourself apart over what you could have done better and maybe if x, y, and z didn’t happen… it’s a vicious cycle of negative thoughts. 

But in a way you almost have to go through that list before you have that talk with yourself. You know that talk… the one where you tell yourself that nothing can change and in that moment you did the best you could with what you had under those circumstances (even if it meant that it wasn’t your best). 

Accepting what happened is the only way you’re going to learn from it and grow from it, otherwise you’ll only spend the rest of your life living out all of the possibilities that could have changed fate. 

Dynamite Dress, Lifestyle, Summer, Street Style, Feminine, Dress, Sandals, Zara, Forever 21, Red Dress, Fashion, Beauty, Canadian Blogger, Montreal


Learn - Review the Past, to Help the Future 

As mentioned before, once you accept something, you’re allowing yourself to learn from it. 

What we all tend to forget in this world of social media and this need to succeed is that we’re not perfect - we’re human. 

It’s what you learn from your experiences that will help you get stronger for the future. There is always room for improvement whether it’s in how your prepare for something, your mentality towards success, or even a deeper issue which may be preventing you from moving forward with your goals. 

Whatever it may be, if you are able to look at the past and learn from it, you will be successful in the future. Those who can’t learn from their mistakes are doomed to repeat them and will never be able to move past them. 

Dynamite Dress, Lifestyle, Summer, Street Style, Feminine, Dress, Sandals, Zara, Forever 21, Red Dress, Fashion, Beauty, Canadian Blogger, Montreal


Change - Put those Changes into Action!

This is where the magic happens. This is where you learn who you truly are and what you are willing to do to be successful in the future. 

In these situations, this is where I can feel that excitement start to grow again. When you start making those small changes to improve yourself,  it reignites that motivation to try again. 

Just because you failed, doesn’t make something impossible to achieve, it just means that you needed more time to learn and grow. You needed more time to look within and push yourself harder to soar past what you originally limited yourself to. 

Maybe try a different technique when it comes to studying or being more proactive at work and networking to expand your engagement to leave a bigger impression. Whatever it is, it’s only going to make you better in the end. 

Personally, I like to take a step back and reassess my goal(s). I’ll then look at what I’ve previously done, and then compare it to what those who have been successful have done as well. This is a great way to get inspired and to recreate my process of training and my overall lifestyle. Because deep down I know I have what it takes, it’s the process of getting there that’s going to require some creativity and even more determination to try something new or different. 

Dynamite Dress, Lifestyle, Summer, Street Style, Feminine, Dress, Sandals, Zara, Forever 21, Red Dress, Fashion, Beauty, Canadian Blogger, Montreal


Final Thoughts

You might not be able to avoid failure, but it's what you get out of the experiences that will define your future. For those who aren’t willing to accept, learn, and change, then I hate to break it you...but you're going to spend the rest of your life either living too scared to ever try or constantly making the same mistakes. We all have the ability to be successful, what it comes down to is your will to give and put yourself out there to fail in the first place. 

I know many of you have probably heard that success is not a linear path, that there are ups and downs and sometimes the downs are going to outweigh the ups. What defines successful people from the rest of society is there will to go out there and fail. 

With every failure comes an opportunity to learn and grow, because even those who seem to have it all, have had to work for it. 

Behind the scenes we’re all fighting to be our own personal best. What majority of people see are only the success stories. Yeah it’s incredible that this athlete has won 5 gold medals at the olympics or this person now runs a multi million dollar company, but what did they do to get there? 

How many times did they have to fail in order to succeed? 

Yes failure sucks and you’re allowed to wallow and grieve that lost opportunity, but don’t let that define who you are. 

Show everyone how you can be better and be that “overnight success” - because you allowed yourself to fail and grow from it. 

Dynamite Dress, Lifestyle, Summer, Street Style, Feminine, Dress, Sandals, Zara, Forever 21, Red Dress, Fashion, Beauty, Canadian Blogger, Montreal

OOTD Details

Dress - Dynamite (Shop Here) *It's On Sale!*
Shopper Bag - Forever 21 (Shop Similar Style Here)
Bracelet - Alex & Ani (Shop Similar Style Here)
Shoes - Zara (sold out)

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